Task 1

 

Introduction

In my Introduction I did not change as much as I did last paper. Last paper I completely changed my intro but with this paper I only changed the last few sentences of my intro. I had an annotation on the first draft that said that I wasn’t making my claim clear of what Building Tasks I was going to talk about in my paper. So in my final draft I made a clear claim of what Building Tasks I was going to talk about in my paper.

 

Evidence and Introduction

In my final draft I added more evidence to my paper. In my first draft I only had evidence for two building tasks, significance and practices. I wanted to talk about a third building task in my final paper so I added a paragraph of evidence on why politics are important. I then modified another evidence paragraph to talk about why all three building tasks were evident in my quote.

 

Reorganization

In my final paper I really wanted to emphasize the organization of my evidence paragraphs. I structured my evidence paragraphs in my final to start with three separate paragraphs on evidence. Each of these three paragraphs had evidence of one of the building tasks, politics, significance, and politics.  Then I had two more evidence paragraphs on evidence where two or all three of the building tasks taking place. I wanted to give a lot of evidence, that was organized to be read easily.

 

New Paragraphs

In my final draft I have one new paragraph. I did combine two evidence paragraphs because upon revision I was making the same point in both and combining them would strengthen my point. I also added politics as one of my building tasks in my paper so I added a paragraph on evidence of politics.

 

ENG110J